Making Up Your Mind That It's My Life
by Robyn the Snowshoe Hare
Summary: A dark building. Unexpected visitors. Musical accompaniment. Does it get much better than this?


Credits: 'Did You Ever Have To Make Up Your Mind' belongs to Lovin Spoonful 'It's My Life' belongs to Bon Jovi  
Lyrics were transcribed by me, and thus are probably wrong.  
  
Explanation: I've been playing with Napster lately, and just listening to the two mentioned songs back-to-back on repeat somehow put this fic into my mind, and it refused to leave. Since I will be going on a week-long vacation tomorrow, I decided to write it, post it, and possibly exorcise the fic demon before the trip.   
*g* Hope it isn't too bad.   
  
~*~*~*~*~   
  
BUFFY SUMMERS (wearing a painfully pink skirt/sweater ensemble,   
circa Season 3) enters an ABANDONED WAREHOUSE of the usual Season 2-esqe   
variety. All is DARK and FOREBODING.   
  
Suddenly,   
  
LIGHTS come on, revealing a STAGE that looks suspiciously like the   
one from the Bronze. In fact, if one didn't know better, one might   
almost suspect that the entire scene had been moved to the Bronze and   
away from the ABANDONED WAREHOUSE of the opening shot.   
  
But, we know that that would never happen.   
  
On the STAGE are four very familiar girls, set up in a band-like   
pattern. FAITH sits at the DRUMS. CORDELIA is armed with an ACOUSTIC   
GUITAR. TARA and ANYA stand at MICROPHONES, as though they might break   
out into song at any moment.   
  
At the sight of this, BUFFY gets noticibly nervous. This is   
understandable, due to the fact that CORDELIA is only scant feet from   
a MICROPHONE.   
  
Responding to some hidden cue, CORDELIA breaks into a rather cheesy   
guitar intro. All signs point to EASY LISTENING AM music.   
  
Buffy: What the fu-   
  
BUFFY COUGHS several times, interrupting her use of a VERY NAUGHTY   
WORD. She attempts to REPEAT HERSELF, but the TV-14 CENSORS ensure   
that the VERY NAUGHTY WORD is garbled and unintelligible.   
  
The Girl Band: (sung) Did you ever have to make up your mind? // Pick   
up on one and leave the other behind // It's not often easy, and not   
often kind // Did you ever have to make up your mind?   
  
Buffy: I'm smelling a setup.   
  
Stepping from a CONVENIENT SHADOW, ANGEL enters the room, with a   
SOULFUL LOOK in his eyes to show everyone that he is most definitely   
of the cuddly care-bear with fangs variety these days. He is wearing   
BLACK (think back to any season he has ever appeared in).   
  
Buffy: (breathy voice) Angel...?   
  
Angel: Buffy. (soulful pause) I love you. I've always loved you -- you   
are my soulmate. In all the years that I have walked this world, you   
are the only person who I have ever loved. I know that I'm not worthy,   
and that you deserve so much better, but I can't deny my own feelings   
any longer. (long pause, during which Buffy cannot speak due to utter   
shock) Oh, come on! Look at me, I'm gorgeous! I came back from Hell   
for you! I'm soulful, I'm angsty, I read stupid French books with a   
brooding look on my face! I can be a bad boy while at the same time   
still being caring, responsible, and noble! You can't get much better   
than me!   
  
Buffy: Angel, I-  
  
Abruptly interrupting her sentence, RILEY FINN walks through the   
FRONT DOOR, with a CARING and RESPONSIBLE look on his face. He is   
wearing COMMANDO DUDS (Season 4).   
  
Buffy: (breathy, but rather confused) Riley..?   
  
Riley: Buffy, (adorably unsure gaze) I love you. I've never met anyone   
who has made me feel the way that you do, and I don't want to ever   
wake up again without you by my side. (long pause, where Buffy glances   
from one man to another with a shellshocked look on her face) Oh, come   
on! I'm the perfect guy for you! I'm a sweet, good 'ole boy from Iowa!   
I gave up my entire career for you, and changed the whole way I look   
at the world! I'm caring, I'm supportive, I'm a psych grad! I can be   
the nice guy who you can feel safe in loving, plus we can have sex!   
I'm the best choice for you!   
  
Buffy: Riley... Angel... I...   
  
The Girl Band: (sung) Did you ever have to finally decide? // Say   
'yes' to one, and let the other one writhe // There's so many changes,   
and tears you must hide // Did you ever have to finally decide? //   
  
Before she can properly complete a thought, SCOTT HOPE enters. He is   
dressed in typical MALE HIGH-SCHOOL STUDENT GARB (of Season 3).   
  
Buffy: (shocked) Scott? But... but...   
  
Scott: Buffy, I love you. (loving gaze of a Buster Keaten fan) I didn't   
realize it before, when I was a fool and dumped you. It is only know   
that I know what a treasure you are, even though I still have no idea   
why you were constantly running off and giving me very little attention.   
(the poignant pause of a recurring character who never really caught   
on) Oh, come on! I'm pretty cute! I used words like 'mosey'! Even   
Faith thought that I was a fairly good-looking little muffin! I gave   
you a claddagh ring as a casual present! I'm great!   
  
Without even a PAUSE to get Buffy's ATTEMPT AT A COMMENT, OWEN   
enters, a fairly vacant expression on his face. He is dressed in MALE   
HIGH-SCHOOL STUDENT GARB (circa Season 1)   
  
Buffy: (completely floored) Owen?   
  
Owen: Buffy, I love you. (vacant gaze of an morbid person) I know we   
went on one date in sophomore year, and that it didn't really go   
along in the manner of typical dates, but I thought that we really   
had a connection. Of death, and stuff like that. (pause, during which   
Owen reads the teleprompter) Oh, come on! Look at me! I'm broody, yet   
I have a pulse! I'm blonde! I read Emily Dickinson! Poems about death,   
loneliness, and bees! You can't top me!   
  
The Girl Band: (sung) Sometimes there's one with big blue eyes, cute   
as a bunny // With hair down to here, and plenty of money // And just   
when you think, he's that one in the world // Your heart gets stolen   
by some mousy little boy //   
  
BUFFY is shooting NASTY GLANCES at THE GIRL BAND, but before she can   
possibly act on them, a CAR with the windows blacked out CRASHES   
through one wall of the BUILDING. The driver's door OPENS, and out   
STEPS SPIKE. He has a typically BAD-ASS look on his face, and is   
dressed in his one and only outfit (Billy Idol/Sid Viscous/black jeans)   
  
Spike: Betty-   
  
Buffy: (irritated) BUFFY.   
  
Spike: Right, whatever. Buffy, I love you. (cheerfully homicidal gaze)   
I mean, sure, we've had our differences, with me wanting to rip out   
your spleen and dance the mambo on your grave, but we can move past   
that. (pause, during which he lights a cigarette) Oh, come on! I'm the   
Big Bad! I'm sodding mean! It's not like I run around all day *helping*   
people like the Ponce or Commando Boy. I use Clairol often, and I have   
an interest in soap-operas as well as decapitation! I... ah, screw   
this. Just pick me!   
  
Buffy: Oh, man.... (looking at the circle of men around her)   
  
Walking in through the GAPING HOLE that SPIKE'S CAR left, XANDER   
enters, with the look of the EVERYMAN UNDERDOG on his face. He is   
wearing a PIZZA DELIVERY OUTFIT (See Season 4, the time of   
emasculation).   
  
Buffy: (still confused) Xander?   
  
Xander: Buffy, I love you. (honest and humorous look) Sure, at first   
it was just a crush, and you blew me off more times than I can even   
count, but this is love. You might've been a little too occupied by   
Broody-Boy to notice, but you have always held my heart in your tiny,   
lotioned hands. (pause, while he eats a Twinkie) Oh, come on! I'm   
cute, I'm dependable, and I've got a truly impressive sense of humor!   
Just tell me that you love me, and maybe wardrobe will finally bury   
the hatchet! For the love of God, please pick me!   
  
BUFFY has gotten over the worst of her shock, and sits on the edge   
of the stage. The BAND plays on.   
  
The Girl Band: (sung) And you know you'd better make up your mind //   
Pick up on one and leave the other behind // It's not often easy, and   
not often kind // Did you ever have to make up your mind? //   
  
Buffy: (muttered) Yeah, yeah, I'm getting the idea already...   
  
A HEAVENLY LIGHT appears overhead, and a FIGURE DESCENDS from the   
RAFTERS. It is DOYLE, with a charming and roguish look on his   
(unprickly) face, he joins the group of suitors who have formed a   
SEMI-CIRCLE around BUFFY. He is dressed in a leather jacket over a   
bowling shirt in typical CUTE SEMI-DRUNK GUY fashion (see Season 1 of   
A:ts).   
  
Buffy: You look kinda familiar...   
  
Doyle: We met once, very briefly. Buffy, I love you. (charmingly   
insecure look) Now, we met for only the briefest of moments in Angel's   
office, but since then I found myself in love with you. My love for you   
caused the Powers That Be to send me back to earth, since even they   
can show mercy in cases such as these. (a pause, during which he   
glances down and realizes that the PTP sent him back with his fly   
unzipped) Pardon me. Anyway, just listen to me Irish accent! It's   
*way* better than Angel's, and I have a right sense of humor and a   
slight penchant for liqueur. Without a doubt, I am the guy for you.   
  
Buffy: Listen, guys, I think that it's really great that you decided   
to surprise me like this, but-   
  
While she comes very close to finishing that sentence, it proves a   
false hope. PARKER ABRAHMS enters through the back door, a misleadingly   
attentive look on his face. He is dressed in SNAZZY CASUAL CLOTHES,   
(Season 4, the early days) which would look really good on Xander,   
come to think of it.   
  
Buffy: Listen, you have a lot of nerve-   
  
Parker: Buffy, I love you. (puppy-dog look) I know, I talked you into   
my bed by misleading you into thinking that I might want a serious   
relationship based on actual feelings, and then shattered your   
confidence in the male half of the species once again by blowing you   
off and moving onto other women. And that later I spoke coarsely of   
you to fellow men. But.... (a pause, while he looks for some redeeming   
quality that he possesses) I'm really cute, and I gave you zip-lock   
bags one time.   
  
BUFFY has stopped looking CONFUSED, and is now just looking ANNOYED   
at any and all of the guys. Almost frantically, the BAND enters   
another verse.   
  
The Girl Band: (sung) Sometimes you really dig a boy the moment you   
kiss him // And then you get distracted by his older brother // Then   
in walks their father, to take you in line // Saying, 'better go home,   
girl, and make up your mind.' //   
  
OZ and JONOTHON enter at the same time through a SIDE-DOOR. They   
consider each other, then go together. OZ's expression is PLACID.   
JONOTHON's expression is somewhat FRAZZLED. Both are in TEE-SHIRTS   
and JEANS. (Season 4)   
  
Buffy: Guys-   
  
Jonothon: Buffy, I love you.   
  
Oz: Same here.   
  
Jonothon: I realize that I might not be the first guy you think of   
romantically, but it really is true. I love you and... stuff...   
(pause, while he looks to Oz for support)   
  
Oz: Ditto.   
  
Jonothon: As for what I can offer.... well... I have this really great   
moped...   
  
Oz: Van. Bass guitar. Animal crackers.   
  
Jonothon: Yeah... so, um, pick.. us?   
  
Buffy: *eyes narrowing dangerously* I think I know what game you're   
playing...   
  
The various MEN exchange horrified GLANCES with the BAND. Immediately,   
a large LIMO tears in through the hole in the wall. Even as it   
screeches to a halt, LINDSAY - the lawyer, GRAHAM - the commando, and   
GUNN - the vigilante, tumble out the door in a clown-car effect. All   
are looking gorgeous in typical Season 4/Ats 1 manner, though a trifle   
out of breath. One look at Buffy, however, and they swallow their   
declarations of TRUE LOVE.   
  
Buffy: (seriously pissed) I *know* what game you're playing!   
  
The MEN CRINGE as she completes a sentence. Several open their   
mouths to try and interrupt her, but one LOOK is enough to shut them   
up.   
  
Buffy: I don't need this CRAP! I don't need some guy to define me,   
and I CAN go for more than one episode without pining after some guy,   
or having some guy pine after me!   
  
There is a brief PAUSE as the shock of the statement rolls around   
the silent room. Then, FAITH puts down her drumsticks and JUMPS off   
the stage to land next to BUFFY.   
  
Faith: B, I lo-   
  
Buffy: Oh, for crying out loud! That didn't mean that I was hoping   
for a WOMAN to pine after! This is not negotiable!   
  
A slight HICCUPING sound is heard, and then an OVERWORKED YET   
HANDSOME BUSINESSMAN walks in. He is DISHEVELED in a GORGEOUS way.   
(circa 1997)   
  
Jerry McGuire: You...complete...me...   
  
Before he can complete that speech, BUFFY PUNCHES him, knocking the   
man OUT FOR THE COUNT.   
  
Buffy: Are you done? Have you GOTTEN THE *FUCKING* MESSAGE?   
  
Stalking over to the STAGE, BUFFY kicks out the amp hookup, cutting   
off the BAND. She pops in a CD, which immediately begins BLARING. The   
beat is hard and driving, and everyone except for BUFFY covers their   
ears in self-defense.   
  
CD: I ain't gonna be just a face in the crowd  
You're gonna hear my voice   
when I shout it out loud  
It's my life  
It's now or never  
And I ain't gonna live forever  
I just wanna live without a lie  
It's my life  
  
With a DEFIANT LOOK, BUFFY tears off her pink skirt/sweater,   
revealing a pair of leather pants and a comfortable top (circa "Bad   
Girls"). As the music continues, she puts on a pair of dark sunglasses   
just as a driverless red CONVERTIBLE pulls into the building through   
the previous hole. It maneuvers easily around the various other parked   
vehicles, and pulls up next to BUFFY. Not even glancing behind her at   
the throngs of MEN, who are desperately calling out their LOVE, BUFFY   
jumps into the DRIVER'S SEAT of the car, and DRIVES OFF. Clouds of dust   
form in her wake, but the last lyrics of the SONG can still be heard.   
  
CD: My heart is like an open highway  
I think it's time we did it my way  
It's my life  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
End notes: Buffy has never spent more than one episode without various angsting, loving, pining, or even just being pined after by the various Lads Of Buffydom. Unlike some, I really do like the character of Buffy. In fact, she's my favorite of the entire extended gang.   
  
Anyway, when I heard Bon Jovi's song "It's My Life", it just seemed perfect for her. Tailor-made. So I downloaded it off of Napster and listened to it for a while, hoping that I could use it in a fic. After a few days, nothing was clicking, so I shrugged and moved on. Then, today, I downloaded the other song that shows up in the story, the one with the long title and annoying lyrics. Listened to it, then listened to Bon Jovi.   
  
Got an idea. Ran with it.   
  
What you just read is the result, for better or worse. Though to get a good idea of just what kind of mental space I was in when I wrote it, listen to the songs listed, starting with the annoying one, and switching over to the Bon Jovi at the appropriate time in the script.   



End file.
